31 Oct 2022
Becoming a leader people want to follow and someone colleagues like to work with.
It always surprises me that employers expect colleagues to gel together without little bonding or understanding of one another. I have worked in a few different places and hands down, the ones that work best are those where everyone, from the top down is transparent in their purpose, their passion and their personality.
Few of us can have escaped working with big egos. There are leadership managers ‘a plenty’ who think their position warrants respect, without attempting to build it themselves from the ground up.
It is a case of “don’t you know who I am?” Some equate position with power. But in our current workplace where the currency of the day is ‘Emotional Intelligence’, it pays to be on an equal footing with your colleagues. Why? Because:
- If no-one trusts you, they will not follow you
- If no one likes you, they will not trust you
And if you do not let anyone get to know you, then how on earth can you build a team that supports a common goal?
The days of being lofty and unavailable are gone. These days it is not just leaders who need to be visible and available. Doors needs to be open. Staff need to understand the company vision, and unless this is shared openly, smooth working may stay a dream.
So how will you get colleagues to trust you?
You have to take an interest in them. That is not just being interested in how they are managing their responsibilities, but in Them.
Be interested in your colleagues. Be genuine in asking about them. No-one cares how much you know, until you show how much you care – so show some authentic interest in what makes them tick.
You may find you share some common ground. You may find answers to some challenges you’ve been having together.
Find out about people (with the right motive – do not be stealthy about it).
Get to know them. As you build a bond, you will find resistance plays a less dominant part and you may even slowly warm to them.
People who bond at work form a much closer link and generally work much more harmoniously together.
Then, when we share our need for work support, it will be easier to get others involved. None of us like information after the event. Share along the way. Involve people in your why, what, how etc.
Salespeople know that involving customers up front in decision making about their future purchases has them almost signed and sealed, so use the marketing mix to your advantage.
Tell colleagues why you are asking for their help in doing certain things. Get them in on the process and ask them to take charge of their decisions.
When they get to know the reasons, you may find them more supportive and ready with support. Trust comes from respect and being treated with grace.
Ask people what they need to get the job done and be ready to provide that. Be ready to listen to their ideas in return.
Explain. Be available. Give information. Be known for your honesty.
- If you want people to Know you, Trust You and Like you, they need to see you are worthy of it.
- Your colleagues want to be treated fairly and with respect
- They want to be listened to and have their questions answered
- They want to be spoken to with kindness
- They want to be understood
- …and appreciated
All this needs our attention.
- To be fair to all you must understand what is required and appreciate what is going on in their ‘world’
- To speak with respect, you must care about people, who they are, and what drives them
- To appreciate colleagues, you need to have gratitude on your agenda
If you want to work in a team where people support each other, you will need to start from the ground up and get to know them. Be authentic and generous in all your exchanges.
Be a colleague with heart and graciousness and sensitive to the feelings, attitudes and atmosphere of those around you.
If you can be someone they can know, like and trust, then you will find yourself working with a strong connected group of individuals with heart on their side.
What part of this could YOU put into action today to help your colleagues know you, like you, trust you? And what difference could that make to those you work with and for?
Love and light,
Geraldine
Get your Know Me, Like Me, Trust Me Workbook at https://www.geraldinejozefiak.com/knowme
You can find out more about CPD courses at https://www.geraldinejozefiak.com/communicatingwithcolleagues